Author Archives: jeanieshaw

An Attitude of Gratitude

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Ever wonder why some people, even amid dire circumstances, continue to be thankful, content and happy individuals while others, who have access to many good things, complain, are unhappy and easily annoyed? I have observed that there is a common theme with gratitude – lack of entitlement  Those who feel the most “entitled”, have the greatest difficulty finding the ability to be truly grateful. When we feel we deserve something, we are often left disappointed, annoyed or angry. At least that’s how it goes for me.  There is just no room for thankfulness.   Consider the challenging but eye (and heart) opening scripture in Luke 17:7-10
“Suppose one of you had a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Would he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, ‘Come along now and sit down to eat’? [8] Would he not rather say, ‘Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you may eat and drink’? [9] Would he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? [10] So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.’ “

This is challenging to me.  However, when I approach my service to God and others out of emptying myself… because of honor and appreciation for Him it changes the way I look at everything.  Though God treats me with incredible love and tenderness, it is often easy to get confused and think that these are things he “owes” me.  In my heart of hearts I know that what I really deserve is to die and go to hell.  That’s truly what I “deserve”, but I can easily forget this fact.  God’s graciousness, however, allows me to be treated not as I deserve, but with the gift of love, kindness and care. Whenever I forget this, I cease to be a grateful person.  Lost gratitude leads to a downward spiral described in Romans 1:21
For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened….

The downward spiral that follows has its beginning with a failure to give thanks.  From there, our thinking becomes futile and we begin a plunge into a dark hole.

However, when I truly believe I have been given God’s mercy…forgiveness, purpose, the power to change, direction for my life, etc, etc…..everything changes, especially my mindset, or attitude.

Romans 12:1-2
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God–this is your spiritual act of worship. [2] Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.

The world around me tells me that I deserve prestige, money, fast internet and even a good parking place.  However, when I live God’s will for my life (which is right, feels good and is all around fantastic!) I am then able to renew my mind and transform my way of thinking. Then I can give, serve and empty myself….only to find that in the meantime I am at peace, happy, grateful and energized.  Gratitude begins with our attitude,… and as the scripture below shows… it puts a song in our hearts and a pep in our step.

Col. 3:15-17
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. [16] Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. [17] And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Over the next few days I plan to think a lot about the incredible blessings of people, places and things for which I am grateful.  I expect to smile a lot, though I’m sure some tears will flow as I remember special memories of those no longer here.  May you have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday, and live with a joyful, thankful attitude…if you live on a trash heap or in a mansion.

The Circle of Life

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The circle keeps on turning.  Over the past two months I’ve keenly felt its spin.  After burying Wyndham’s dad in early fall I reflected how short a long life of 92 years really is in the scheme of time.  The scripture is so true in James 4:14
Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.

A week ago I witnessed the dramatic birth  of my newest grandchild, who is aptly named “Grace”.  Though she tried mightily to make her debut much too early, God graciously answered “yes” to our pleas for her to stay put long enough to be healthy. I shared earlier the scripture from Jeremiah 29:11-13 that emboldened my spirit  as I watched this new life emerge.
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. [12] Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. [13] You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

A few days ago my first-born turned 34….Hard to believe.  In many ways it seems like yesterday when I was 34, and yet in other ways it seems like ions ago.  So much of life has been lived and I look forward to the gift of each new day God gives me. Each day truly is a gift from God. Psalm 118:24
This is the day the Lord has made;
        let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Last week, as I shared a few days ago, we lost our dog, who was such a part of our family.  At 14 and a half, he had already outlived his life expectancy.  The circle of life keeps on spinning.  Sometimes it exhilarates my heart, and at other times it seems to break it into pieces.

When I keep the perspective that each day is a gift from God, full of opportunity to live out his purpose for my life, it affords a “joie de vivre” that will make a huge difference in my own quality of life as well as the impact I can have on those whose lives I touch.  I was moved by my Bible reading today as I read of David in Acts 13:22.
After removing Saul, he made David their king. He testified concerning him: ‘I have found David son of Jesse a man after my own heart; he will do everything I want him to do.’    What a tribute to a man, though flawed, to be recorded for all history as a man after God’s own heart – doing everything God has planned for him.  I then read on to verse 36.
  “For when David had served God’s purpose in his own generation, he fell asleep; he was buried with his fathers and his body decayed. [37] But the one whom God raised from the dead did not see decay.

What a thing to be said about his life…..He “served God’s purpose in his generation”.  Simple, yet profound!  We certainly are not just bodies with souls inside.  We are souls created for a purpose that are surrounded by temporary bodies.  When we are born spiritually, these souls will live forever.  1 Peter 1:22-25.
Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart. [23] For you have been born again, not of perishable seed, but of imperishable, through the living and enduring word of God. [24] For  “All men are like grass,
        and all their glory is like the flowers of the field;
    the grass withers and the flowers fall, [25] but the word of the Lord stands forever.”
I pray to be about God’s purpose in my life today and each day.  I’m grateful that his word clarifies that purpose for me.  It is sometimes thrilling, sometimes scary, sometimes difficult….but it is always so right and always so good when God stays at the center of this spinning circle.

New Life

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Thirty four years ago, at this same hour, I was likely preparing for bed.  Pregnant with my first child, I wondered if by some chance my child would be born on my due date, November 17. Wyndham, sick with a bad cold, had remarked that he hoped it would not be that particular night, given his sickness.  However, as time would have it, a few hours later I woke him…knowing that we should to head to the hospital.  About five hours after our arrival we welcomed our first-born, Melissa Allison, into the world.  I’ll never forget the amazement of holding this miracle of new life that had been formed inside my body.  Nothing could have prepared me for the joy of that moment.  I felt for her the same anticipation described in  Jeremiah 29:11, that God feels for his people.
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  

I had hopes and dreams for my new daughter.  This scripture helped me better begin to grasp something of what God felt for me.  He wasn’t out to harm me…he felt about me the way this scripture describes. The response to this love is up to us…as the scripture continues.

[12] Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. [13] You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Thirty-four years later I stand with deep gratitude and admiration for the woman of God that this once tiny baby has become. I love her more than words can express. She has sought to please God with all of her heart, soul, mind and strength and her life has eternally affected so many.  She brings her husband much joy, and is a pretty amazing mom.  Often I marvel at what she gets done in a day.   Her sensitivity and giving spirit to her family is extraordinary and she is one of the most loyal friends to others that I know. She truly inspires me.  I just wanted to take a moment to share my gratitude for the blessing of the miracle that came into my life on November 17, 1977.

Goodbye Ol’ Friend (Jordan Shaw, July 3, 1997 – November 15, 2011)

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-Can’t say I’ve ever written a letter to a dog before.  However, as I say goodbye to you, my furry friend,  I want to thank you for several things.  I think you know them, but it’s therapeutic for me to write them down.

It seems a mere “blink” ago when Wyndham and I decided, while on a marriage getaway, to look for you.  We found you in Maine and stopped by to surprise the kids with you, while on our way home.   They were at teen camp, and were so thrilled they could hardly contain themselves.  I felt an instant kinship with you, as we got carsick together on the way home.  Proverbs 6:6 tells of what we can learn from watching the ways of an ant.  Let me tell you ten things I have learned from watching you – the ways of a Golden Retriever.

  1.  You stretched yourself. – You were pretty fast yourself, but as a youngster I loved watching you run with Pharoah, the neighborhood greyhound.  You tried so hard to keep up…and made yourself stronger and faster by having a buddy like that.  I, too, always need to surround myself with people who are better at things than I am.  It makes me grow.
  2.  You thrilled at your purpose. – You came from a hunting heritage.  It was a beautiful thing to see you hunt pheasant (as I’ve seen from the videos). You gave your master, Wyndham, so many great memories.  Your instinct was natural.  God made you to hunt birds…and you did it well.  Though perhaps a “spoiled bird dog” you didn’t hesitate to the thrill of finding birds.  (Well…except the one extremely cold, rainy morning when you knew Wyndham was going hunting and you hid under the covers at my feet.  He looked all over for you.  I told you I wouldn’t tell….but finally had to “spill the beans” – sorry… however I heard you did enjoy it).   When you started to get too old to hunt you went out with the new little guys (the goldens we got for Sam and Kristen) and  showed them what to do.  You trained them when you got too old to run.  Likewise, I know I am so much happier when I am living out the purpose for which God created me.  And…as I age I want to be all about passing what I have learned on to others.
  3. You made friends with everyone. –  I called you the “mayor of the park”.  Since we live across the street from a park you assumed every person or dog that came was there to be your friend.  So many people in this town know your name.  You loved everyone.  You joined in a few soccer games, ended up at neighbors ‘ homes, and even had little girls down the street come knock on our door every afternoon after school to ask, “Can Jordan come out to play with us?”  You have introduced me to so many people, and remembering your ways encourages me to try to make friends with new people.
  4. You loved children. –  You were the best dog a kid or grown up could have.  You made Jacob’s transition into our home so much easier for him…as you seemed to understand Romanian better than anyone. He had many conversations with you. You raced our kids down many a hill while they were sledding.  You welcomed each of the grandchildren – and even let them ride you like a horse.  Even in these last few days, feeling so badly, you patiently lay still while Micah held you around your torso to hug you and kiss you.
  5. You cared, in your own doggy way. –  You had a keen sensitivity to emotions.  Whenever I was sad you would just come close to be near.  That’s all.  Whenever anyone came over to talk with us… if they were hurting or crying you always chose to sit close to them.  Somehow you knew.  I see how sometimes just being there…really helps.
  6.  You took care of your “little brother” and endured his neediness of you. –  Poor Blackie (our cock-a-poo, named by Jacob, who got him for Christmas 10 years ago) will be lost for a while without you.  He has never known life away from you.  He slept inside of your four legs all scooched up to your stomach.  Thinking he is part cat, he constantly groomed you..from the insides of your ears to your gums (I know…disgusting)….and you let him!  Even last week, though you can’t walk, you somehow managed to get up when he was being chased by a dog.  You were a great big brother.  I can sometimes get annoyed by others’ neediness.  May I learn to have the patience you showed.
  7. You weren’t afraid to ask. – You loved sweets, particularly chocolate chip cookies.  I never could resist those eyes.  They caused me to give my food away to you, even the last licks of my ice cream (and I don’t like to part with my ice cream).  You assumed I should have a piece of popcorn and then you should get a piece…and back and forth we would go.  You mastered the art of propping your head on my knee and giving me the “sad eyes”.  You loved our “Nana and Papa nights” where you got lots of pizza from begging with all the grandkids.  You were persistent…and it worked.  While I don’t want to be a nag…sometimes I lack the courage to ask for things.
  8. You never had a bad day. –  You were so consistent in your demeanor…always happy.  You got lyme disease several times, hit by a car once,  skunked a few times, and were constantly losing your hair. (Wow, I even think I’ll miss using the lint roller several times a day.) You were in pain often this last year but never complained.   You just stayed happy….this is one more reason it’s just hard to say goodbye.  May I be as content as you were.
  9. You grew old with dignity. – These last few days, you tried so hard to help us out when  it came time to carry you outside.  I know you wanted to do for yourself, and it was  hard on you to be so needy.  When you could still walk, you would sometimes need an encouraging word to go up the stairs but you would push yourself hard.  I think you would truly rather die than “mess up” in the house.  You like privacy when you do your business.  You remind me that…even though you are a dog…you have dignity about you.  How much more do I need to honor those who are aging and show them dignity and respect.
  10. You lived to please your master. – This is what stands out to me the most, old friend.  You truly did live to please your master.  Nothing pleased you more than to please first Wyndham, and then me.  As I write this with tears streaming…I pray that what can most be said about my life is that I live to please my master.  Nothing better could be said.  Thank you for 14 golden years, golden boy.  I will miss you more than you know.

Eccles. 3:1-8

    There is a time for everything,

        and a season for every activity under heaven:

        [2] a time to be born and a time to die,

        a time to plant and a time to uproot,

        [3] a time to kill and a time to heal,

        a time to tear down and a time to build,

        [4] a time to weep and a time to laugh,

        a time to mourn and a time to dance,

        [5] a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,

        a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

        [6] a time to search and a time to give up,

        a time to keep and a time to throw away,

        [7] a time to tear and a time to mend,

        a time to be silent and a time to speak,

        [8] a time to love and a time to hate,

        a time for war and a time for peace.

Welcome Amazing Grace

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This will be a very short but special blog post today.   I have just returned from witnessing another miracle.  The miracle of new life never ceases to amaze me.  Just a few hours ago, at 1:17am on 11-11-11 my newest granddaughter entered this world. She has been prayed for so often, as she tried to make an early debut in late September.  I marvel at God’s grace… letting us meet 7 lb. 3 oz. baby Grace.    Psalm 139:13-18
    For you created my inmost being;
        you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
    [14] I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
        your works are wonderful,
        I know that full well.
    [15] My frame was not hidden from you
        when I was made in the secret place.
    When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
        [16] your eyes saw my unformed body.
    All the days ordained for me
        were written in your book
        before one of them came to be.

    [17] How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
        How vast is the sum of them!
    [18] Were I to count them,
        they would outnumber the grains of sand..

A Listening Ear

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My ears seem too sensitized and it’s affecting my sleep.  For the past 6 weeks I have had my phone in my room – on standby for baby delivery news.  3 of those weeks, while Kristen was hospitalized, my ears were also tuned in to the baby monitor in our room – in case my grandson, who was sleeping upstairs, awoke.  I would wake up to the slightest stirring. I even started incorporating hearing the phone ring or hearing my grandson with a croupy cough in my dreams.  I would wake up only to realize I was only hearing Wyndham or me breathing.

Now, I hear whimpering through the night from Jordan, our ailing Golden Retriever.  He used to be so quiet.  Now, he is excited when he stands up – and he wants to let us know.  He barks when he needs to go out, when he wants water and when he wants another pbj (peanut butter and jelly sandwich – his new fave. He is still not wanting his dog food…hmmm, I wonder why) Last night he began barking for seemingly no reason.  It seems he was lonely.  Once we brought him into our room he was fine.  He just wanted company.

Last night I was tempted to put on my noise cancelling earphones (got a great deal at Brookstone Outlet) and just fall asleep listening to Kenny G.  Or, better yet…. listening to quietness.  However,  I need to be able to hear since I’m “on call”.

I started thinking about how amazing God is.  He is always on call.  Psalm 55:17

Evening, morning and noon

        I cry out in distress,

        and he hears my voice.

 He never sleeps. (Psalm 121:3-4) His ears are always attentive to the cries of the righteous.   1 Peter 3:12

    For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous

        and his ears are attentive to their prayer,

    but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.

   This blows my mind.  This is a dimension beyond my understanding.   I can tire by just being attentive with my immediate family (dogs included).   God is listening for all those who are seeking him, and attentive to all those who are striving to follow him.  It is a sobering thought to know that God does not listen when we aren’t seeking him or seeking to follow him.   Isaiah 59:2

    But your iniquities have separated

        you from your God;

    your sins have hidden his face from you,

        so that he will not hear.

I’m so grateful that God wants to hear my voice. Psalm 5:3

    In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice;

        in the morning I lay my requests before you

        and wait in expectation.

 I want to be most sensitized to hearing God.  I want to hear him as I read my Bible, and as I ask for wisdom, and as I try to be tuned in to His Spirit.  I pray that today I can be “on call” to His voice.

John 10:27     My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.

Carried Close to His Heart

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Isaiah 40:11

    He tends his flock like a shepherd:

        He gathers the lambs in his arms

    and carries them close to his heart;

        he gently leads those that have young.

I think of this verse as I watch my husband carry Jordan in and out of the house, first thing in the morning and  last thing at night.  This new routine is causing some back soreness, but we think it’s worth it. This caretaking of our invalid dog is teaching me many lessons.

Saturday morning I had a good cry –  a deep sob is more accurate.  It had been two days since Jordan had eaten or had drunk water.  He would and could not stand.  Wyndham and I concurred that we would wait until Monday to decide whether to put him down, but I felt the inevitable was approaching.

I had made him scrambled eggs, meat, and chicken soup – and offered them all to him.  He had no interest.  Then he surprised me. Saturday night, on a whim, I tried feeding him Ritz crackers with peanut butter on them.  Apparently, that hit the spot.  He at the whole roll of crackers.  Yesterday he had about 4 hamburgers, a chocolate chip cookie (his favorite…and chocolate hasn’t hurt him in his 14 years) and drank a lot of water.   Last night he stood up.  This morning, I cooked some ground beef (with  some mashed sweet potatoes added) and he ate it all from my hand.  Then, after being carried outside he stood up, did his business and wagged his tail.  It seems he truly is getting better!  Whether or not he will fully recover is still unknown, but I’m encouraged.

Meanwhile, I think about the fact that he is our dog.  A perfectly wonderful dog mind you; but I do realize he is not quite human.  I think about the tender loving care he needs right now and how eager I am to give it.  And I am a very imperfect human.

I can’t really begin to grasp the love God extends to me.  It floors me to think that I am made in his image….thought of even before I was born (Psalm 139) and that he gathers me in his arms, close to his heart as the scripture above states.  Shamefully, I worry about too many things.  Next time (likely later tonight) when I’m tempted to worry about something I need to remember how I feel about my dog… remember God’s loving care for me, his sheep.  Nothing is too big (or too little) for my God.

Matthew 6:25-27

    “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? [26] Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? [27] Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

Luke 12:22-26

    Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. [23] Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. [24] Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! [25] Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? [26] Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

 

 

Spaced Repetition

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Anyone who knew my dad will likely remember his use of the phrase “spaced repetition”.  He was a firm believer that in order to really learn something, understand it and put it into practice we need to hear it over and over again, spaced throughout time.  I have come to realize the wisdom in that phrase.

Lately, as I have spent more time than usual with my youngest grandson, I have listened  to “Wheels on the Bus”, “Itsy Bitsy Spider” and “Where is Thumbkin?”  over and over again. Much to my annoyance, I find myself inadvertently singing these songs in my head.  I have even found myself saying out loud the words “digger” when I see an excavator and “school bus” when a bus goes past me.  And sadly, that is when I am by myself in the car. The things I hear again and again quickly surface.

Yet, I have so many things crammed into my brain that it is sometimes hard to remember the names of people I know well.  I can tell myself to remember something, but unless I write it down it may not be thought of again.  And of course then I have to remember where I wrote it. But first, I need to remember again what I am looking for! By then, I may have forgotten why I was looking for it in the first place!  Many things I realize I know, but I need my memory stirred to bring them to the surface again.

God knew we need to be reminded of spiritual truths. He reminds us in several ways:  Through his Spirit;  John 14:26
But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.

Through his Word; Romans 15:15
  I have written you quite boldly on some points, as if to remind you of them again, because of the grace God gave me
1 Cor. 15:1
Now, brothers, I want to remind you of the gospel I preached to you, which you received and on which you have taken your stand.
2 Peter 1:12
So I will always remind you of these things, even though you know them and are firmly established in the truth you now have.

And through other people;  1 Cor. 4:17
For this reason I am sending to you Timothy, my son whom I love, who is faithful in the Lord. He will remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church.

He also asks us to do the remembering and reminding. Where do you focus your thoughts? We focus our thoughts and set our minds on the things most important to us. I’ll never have His Word, His Spirit and the reminders of his way of life I learn from other people if I don’t put myself in front of these things.

Philip. 4:8
  Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.

Col. 3:1-2
Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. [2] Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

Almost Taken Out By The Trash Truck

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“Stop!  Stttoooooopp!”  I screamed as I, donned in my bathrobe, went tearing out of my house across the snowy grass to the middle of the road. Jordan, our 14 year old golden, was stretched out on the road and a huge garbage truck was barreling toward him at full speed.

As I wrote yesterday, Jordan has a temporary illness called Old Dog Vestibular Syndrome, which lasts about a week.  During this time he is an invalid.  He is completely disoriented, nauseous, and can’t walk without trembling and falling over.  Wyndham had lovingly carried Jordan outside for his morning business, and then let him lay in the grass and enjoy the outdoors while Wyndham ventured out for a prayer walk.  I guess it was more than Jordan could bear to see his master walk without him.  Though it seemed he would not be able to move any further while quietly enjoying the breeze,  he somehow found a way to get up and try to follow Wyndham.  He only made it to the middle of the street, where he lay helpless. I looked out of the window just in time to see this near- tragedy unfolding.

I saw the truck speeding ahead and then couldn’t see Jordan anymore.  My heart melted – and then as the truck passed I saw Jordan looking up at me.  The truck had missed him by inches.  I ran out and snatched him up (adrenaline works well in these situations) and brought him back inside.  My heart pounding, I was grateful for the good outcome, and that Wyndham would not face such a devastating situation upon his return.

I realize I may have lost those of you who are not “dog people”, but those who are can relate to my feelings.  As I took some time this morning to “Be still and know that He is God” (from Psalm 46:10).   I thought about this situation and the lessons I could take away from it.

Immediately, one of my favorite scriptures in Jude came to mind.  Jude 1:20-25
But you, dear friends, build yourselves up in your most holy faith and pray in the Holy Spirit. [21] Keep yourselves in God’s love as you wait for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ to bring you to eternal life.
    [22] Be merciful to those who doubt; [23] snatch others from the fire and save them; to others show mercy, mixed with fear–hating even the clothing stained by corrupted flesh.
    [24] To him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy– [25] to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen.

What an upward call to me today. 1) to take personal responsibility to build myself up in holy faith and to pray.  2) to keep myself in God’s love….and not spiritually wander so I am more vulnerable to “garbage” running over me  3) to be merciful to those who doubt…combined with the appropriate fear of God and pursuit of holiness and 4) to have as much concern for my spiritual family to snatch them from harm’s way as I felt this morning for Jordan.

I’m inspired by Jude’s benediction….that my God is able to keep me from falling, and through Jesus, present me to Himself without fault and with great joy. Wow.

Old Dog Syndrome

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The good news is that our electricity is back!  Just as I had taken the last of the used- to- be frozen things from the freezer it came back.  Yes, we will be eating lots of fish and pheasant, as will our neighbors. I hurried to my daughter’s house, to pick up my things and our dogs and return home.

Jordan, our 14 year old golden retriever, was on the floor when I arrived and could not get up. He looked disoriented and scared…in really bad shape.  I called the vet, who was eager to see him.  When my son- in- law returned from work, he loaded Jordan in the car so I could take him to his appointment.  Fearing the worst, I cried all the way there…praying and telling God that I needed my husband for this scary trip to the vet.  Wyndham was on a plane, due to arrive home later in the night.

When I arrived at the vet, I began to sob… thinking of all the wonderful memories with Jordan and that I might not ever take him home again….and that my husband might not be able to tell his beloved dog goodbye.  The doctor (who is very partial to golden retrievers) brought him in for examination and explained that he had Old Dog Vestibular Syndrome.  The great news was hearing that in 85% of cases it clears up within the week.  Happily, we loaded him back up and my neighbor brought him in for me.  I was told that he would be a total invalid during this time and needed extra TLC and reassurance…as it was frightening to him. He would have to be carried outside (and he weighs 60 pounds). Wyndham arrived back late…and carried him out then and again this morning in hopes he would figure a way to relieve himself (which amazingly he did though I will spare you details). This syndrome causes a dog’s head to tilt and eyes to twitch. They are often nauseous because they lose all sense of balance – not knowing which way is up or which way is down.  Watching Jordan try to walk is pitiful.  He looks like an old man in a drunken stupor…who wobbly walks in circles and then falls down.

As I heard him whimpering before daylight and went out to lay on the floor beside him (a mother’s ears are always tuned in to pain) I realized that perhaps I was pretty pathetic looking – laying on the floor with our dog while our other dog stretched out on the sofa above me.  Immediately after I arrived, Jordan fell back asleep beside me. Since the floor was kind of hard, I did more thinking than sleeping.  I thought about how Jesus felt about those around him who were completely disoriented by their own choices and their lack of looking to him for direction. Mark 6:34
When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. So he began teaching them many things.

I also thought of Galatians 6:2
Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

Watching Jordan’s helplessness will prayerfully help me today look at others through Jesus’ eyes of compassion.  As much as I love Jordan…I know each person is a true treasure – though often disoriented, helpless and harassed.